


Times Like These

by flavouredice



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, Pocket Monsters: Ruby & Sapphire & Emerald | Pokemon Ruby Sapphire Emerald Versions
Genre: Crack, Humor, M/M, Romance, references to another anime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-29
Updated: 2010-12-29
Packaged: 2017-11-09 00:18:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/449135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flavouredice/pseuds/flavouredice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's times like these that Steven questions his sanity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Times Like These

**Author's Note:**

> I was only 15 when I writ this fic. I understand now with a clarity that I didn't have at that age why these fic is all sorts of fucked up. I'm honestly considering taking this down because of the content.

Steven was never a fan of animated shows when he was child. Always found them to be a tremendous bore and what not; made by old men stuck behind stuffy desks with tunnel-vision imagination. To say that his opinion of these types of shows was drastically changed as he got older would be an understatement. Blown out of the water was more like it. Thrown into a shrewder and tossed back out on the other end, only to fall onto a conveyer belt and repeat the process all again.

Never again would he look at children's' shows the same. Especially when the shows featured oh-so-innocently placed seductive butler's lusting after the soul of an obliviously naïve underage-child. Yes, today's shows were completely and utterly devoid of any subtext; no double-entendres in sight at all. No come-hither children commanding their butlers to undress them…

Actually, he's quite sure he'll never be able to see right after all that. It's times like these that Steven wonders how he's managed to stay sane, and when he thinks about it; he probably isn't. All he can do is sit quietly on the couch while Ruby squeals - practically in his ear, mind you - and wonder how that butler doesn't jump the master. And how someone's been secretly filming his life and turned it into an anime. Because he's pretty sure that he's like the butler and that Ruby's the oblivious master.

He becomes positive he isn't sane when he comes home one day and Ruby is on the counter, legs deliciously spread and lace tumbling down the curvatures of his shoulders, body clad in an oddly familiar tea rose pink dress. When Ruby utters a command with the name Sebastian tacked onto the end, there is no doubt in Steven's mind that there is no way he is sane.

It's also times like these that he wishes he was like that demonic butler because he would have made a German chocolate cake with instead of going behind that table and pinning down the boy with sanguine jewel eyes.

And when Norman, that annoying, over protective father, calls later to find out why Ruby was not home yet Steven again wishes that he was that butler so that he could utter something other than a rather pronounced  _well_.

It's times like these that Steven questions his sanity, and how he came to the point of watching strange children's shows and having a fetish for a certain someone in dresses, but he wouldn't have his life any other way.


End file.
